Thursday, December 31, 2009

Light Me Up! The story of my dead clit.

Years ago, my clit was dead. Okay, not really dead but it might as well have been. I could only have an orgasm through G-Spot stimulation and I felt like I was missing out. Everyone kept telling me that the clit was the most magical place on my body but I wasn't convinced because it sure didn't seem to work for me. I didn't know what to do to bring my clit back to life so I turned to one of my favorite sexperts, Ducky Doolittle! She has a way in which she talks about sex and toys that just seems to make perfect sense. With her help I came up with a game plan to revive my clit. The first order of business was to get myself a good strong vibrator. I went for the classic pocket rocket. The next step was to use it EVERY DAY. I did this for around a month. I tried just about every way I could think of when it came to stroking it across my clit. I went to the right side and the left, up and down and even in circles. I made up patterns and tried all kinds of stuff. After a good long while I started to feel some changes. My body started reacting to the stimulation in ways I had not expected and for the first time ever I started to understand what all the fuss was about. After figuring out where the sweet spots were I wasn't shocked when it finally happened. I had my first orgasm ever from just stimulating my clit. I was so relieved. My clit wasn't dead after all. I just needed to learn how to make it do its thing. My pocket rocket is now a staple item in my toy box. I go through more AA batteries with this thing then you can even imagine! But let me tell you, I never masturbate with out this toy close by. Not ever!

So what is this pocket rocket I am speaking of? Well, tons of companies have been making them for years but I have a special version that I carry in my online store.

Light Me Up Vibe

This toy doesn't look like much but boy does it pack a punch. The Light Me Up Vibe runs on a single AA battery. It is a single speed vibrator but as the battery fades so does the power of this toy. When it starts to get to low I just pop in a new AA and away we go! What is cool about this version is that it actually lights up when it is turned on. This makes finding any other toys you have laying around a bit easier. Not to mention any extra batteries you might bring along for the fun. The Light Me Up Vibe has a small O ring inside it where the two parts of the toy connect. This makes the toy waterproof and safe to use in the shower. It also makes clean up a bit easier. Simply wash with a little soap and water. I like to have a small finger nail brush on hand for cleaning as there are 3 little nubs at the top of the toy that are a little tricky to clean around. A little scrub and you are good to go.

This toy is so simple in design that it is hard to believe that it is so amazing but trust me it is. The best part is the price. The Light Me Up Vibe like many of its pocket rocket friends runs around $18. This isn't an expensive toy so they can die after some time but don't worry I promise you will enjoy every cent you spend on this one. So if you are a girl like me that is looking to revive your clit or you a just a girl that loves that clitoral stimulation your toy box simply must have one of these!

You can find the Light Me Up Vibe under the "Toys" section of my online toy store.

Material: Hard Plastic
Size: 2.5" Length
Vibration: One Speed
Lube: Water based Lube, or Silicone
Cleaning: Wash with soap and water, Use a small scrub brush for parts
Batteries: One AA Battery required
Rating: ***** 5 out of 5 Stars

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Get into the "Flow" of things.

I missed the day that Metis Black from Tantus Inc. came by our Sirius/ XM studios to show off her new line of "Alumina" toys. I had only heard rumors about these sexy works of art and I had been looking forward to holding them in my hot little hands. Then I got sick! I was fucking bummed. That is until I came into the work the following day. Metis being the amazing person she is had left the entire line behind for me to try out for myself. I was over the moon with excitement! I took them right home with me that night and tried them out. One word for ya: AMAZING!

For this blog entry I am just going to focus on my personal favorite from the Alumina line but don't worry I promise I will cover the others in the coming weeks.


Flow, is such a simple name for such an incredible toy. Flow is made from 100% recyclable, high grade anodized aluminum. This makes Flow very durable not to mention waterproof and hypoallergenic.

I know you are thinking, "A metal toy is that really going to feel good?" The simple answer is yes. Metal toys have a lot of unique attributes that make then tons of fun to play with. For instance, the toys in the Alumina line feature very smooth surfaces and this makes the sliding in and out simply delightful. Unlike toys made of rubber and silicone you get a much smoother entry. The toys from the Alumina line also retain temperature really well. This means you can heat them up or cool them down for fun sensation play. I keep a couple of bowls near my bed with hot and cold water. After a simple dip and the temp of the toy quickly changes. This also means that these toys will heat up to your body temp very quickly and stay that way! I personally love the feel of the cool metal as I get started. Sensational!

One of the coolest features of the toys from this Tantus Alumina line is that they are all made of two independent parts. See that little black O ring in the middle of Flow.

That is where the toy screws apart. You can then take the two pieces and pair them up with another piece from the Alumina line. You can literally create all new toys! The more Alumina toys you have the more choices you have. They are all completely interchangeable. Where else are you going to find a toy that can do that?

Flow can be used in a variety of ways. Due to its ergonomic design it is perfect for a sensual genital massage but it also works for an assortment of fun activities. The design enables you to select either end of this toy to use so if you like your toy big or small you can have it all with Flow. I love the way this toy applies pressure to my G-spot.

The weight of the toy feels great but also works my PC muscles. If you are interested in strengthening your PC muscles insert the smaller end and flex. This exercise is the equivalent of lifting a small bar bell. See working out can be fun.

The smaller end also makes a great tool to help massage and relax the sphincter muscle for anal sex! Due to the flexibility of this toy it makes a wonderful addition to just about anyone's toy box.
You can clean this toy in just about every way. Soap and water works, it is boilable and you can even throw it in the dishwasher. The only annoying thing about this toy when cleaning is that little black O ring. You need to make sure you unscrew the toy a little during cleaning to make sure you get that little O ring and surrounding area clean.

Flow is truly a fantastic toy. I might have used it exclusively for a couple of months after I used it the first time. You can find Flow and all of the Alumina toys in my online toy store in the "Toys" section.

Material: Anodized Aluminum
Size: Length 9.25 " Diameter at top: 1.5" at bottom:.75"
Weighs: 12.25 oz
Cleaning: Soap and water, Boilable, Dishwasher safe
Accessories: Revolve, Motion, Pace
Rating: ***** 5 out of 5 Stars

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

A tale of a boy and his Boy Butter.

Long before I was a host on Sirius/XM radio I was a budding dildo whisperer. All of my teenage nephews knew that when they were ready to become sexually active to call me and I would send them a discreet "care package" filled with everything they would need to practice safe sex. They got lube packets, safe sex pamphlets and of course tons of condoms. I was the cool aunt that never told their parents but always made sure that they were playing safe. 

Years after I sent my nephew Raif his first care package we were talking on the phone. No longer an awkward teenager but rather a young man in his early twenties he asked me if I had any good porn laying around the office. Of course I did because I always have an abundance of straight porn as I have little need for it. I grabbed a couple of good DVD's and threw them in a box. Then I spotted some containers of Boy Butter and thought he could probably use a little lube too. So into the box it went. I shipped the box off and didn't think anything of it. That is until the next time he and I spoke on the phone. During the course of the conversation he raved about the lube that I had sent him. At the time I couldn't even remember what brand I had sent him so I made him explain the package to me. He laughed a little and said, "well, it looks like a tub of butter". Ahh yes, Boy Butter. He went on to say that his jacking off had never felt better. Sure it was a little TMI but to be honest I was interested in his honest opinion on this brand of lube and he was more than willing rave on about it. He then asked if I would send him more because even though I had sent him a pretty good sized tub he had already used it all up. In less than 3 weeks I might add! That was all I needed to know that Eyal Feldman (the inventor of Boy Butter) had come up with a winner!

Now let's talk about Boy Butter!

Boy Butter comes in several formulas and containers but they all share a few traits. First, Boy Butter lubes are all a cream style lube. I like the creamy lubes because they really work well for men while they are jacking off but the creamy style also pairs nicely with anal sex. Secondly, the entire line of Boy Butter lubes washes off with a little soap and water. Meaning you don't have to worry about stains on your sheets or a difficult clean up. Anyone who had ever had a silicone lube stain on their bed sheets can tell you how this is a beneficial trait.

In terms of containers nearly all of the Boy Butter products come in one of three styles of containers. I suggest picking the container that best fits your needs.
1. A Tub (these vary in size from 4 oz &\ 8 oz)
5. The EZ-Pump (5 oz)
The Boy Butter line up all started with Boy Butter.

Boy Butter comes with the yellow label and was the first lube in the Boy Butter Line up. Boy Butter is an oil-based lubricant that is made up from two very gentle ingredients: coconut oil and organic silicone. These ingredients are then homogenized just like real butter and the end result is a long lasting creamy lubricant. This lube is hypoallergenic and is safe on all toys. However, there is one VERY IMPORTANT thing I must tell you about. Because this lube is oil-based it is not compatible with any latex safer sex supplies like latex condoms. So this lube is best used for solo play or sex with a trusted partner. Currently, this is the only version of Boy Butter that we are carrying in my online store and it can be found in both of the containers pictured above under the "Bath, Body and Wellness" section of the store.

Active Ingredients: Coconut Oil and organic Silicone
Applications: Masturbation, Sex Toy Play, Anal Sex
Warnings: Do not use with Latex Condoms, NOT latex compatible.
Accessories: Your hand, Male Strokers/ Masturbation Sleeves, Sex toys
Rating: *** 3 out of 5 stars

You'll Never Know It Isn't Boy Butter (H2O Version)

Eyal Feldman understands the importance of safer sex practices which is why he came out with a water based version of his Boy Butter lube. This one appropriately called, "You'll Never Know It Isn't Boy Butter" is very similar to the original formula with a few small ingredient changes. This lube starts out as a water based gel lube that has Vitamin E and Shea butter added to it. The end result is a creamy lube that is safe for men or women and is latex compatible. This lube goes on clear and will last longer then most water based lubes. This means less time re-applying and more time enjoying yourself. It carries the same non-staining and easy clean up attributes as the Original Boy Butter but with the added bonus of safe sex compatibility.

Active Ingredients: Water based Gel lubricant, Vitamin E and Shea Butter
Applications: Use During Sex, Masturbation, Sex Toy Play, Anal Sex, Safe for Men or Women
Accessories: Your hand, Male Strokers/ Masturbation Sleeves, Sex toys
Rating: **** 4 out of 5 stars

There are additional products from Boy Butter but I will save those for another day. It is worth taking a few minutes to head over to the Boy Butter site though and checking the entire line out.

If you have a sex or sex toy question that you want answered, email the Dildo Whisperer at Or if you have a specific toy from my online store that you want the Dildo Whisperer to review let me know.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Clean Up AND Get Off

Keeping with the sex in the shower theme I want to go over a couple of fun items that will make bath time even more pleasurable. What I love about the next couple of items is that they serve more then one purpose. You can use these items to soap up and get off! All of these toys were designed by the brilliant minds over at Sportsheets and they are a part of the Sex in the Shower line. All of these items can be found in my online store under the "Bath, Body and Wellness" section.

We all have one of those mesh sponge things in our shower that we use to soap up and scrub off right? I think my shower actually has like three of them in it. So who would notice one more?

Introducing the Vibrating Mesh Sponge!

This discreet toy is the perfect bathtub accessory. Inside this mesh sponge is a small water proof vibrator. With the push of one button it will start vibrating and no one would be the wiser! Use it for a solo shower or surprise your lover with a sexy massage. The vibrator is a single speed and runs on a couple of watch batteries. The batteries are easy to change out so this vibrating mesh sponge will keep you happy for a long time!

Materials: Mesh Sponge
Vibration: One Touch, Single speed Bullet Vibe
Batteries: Watch Batteries
Rating: *** 3 out of 5 stars

Perhaps you don't like those little mesh scrubby things. Well, fear not there is an alternative.

Just like the mesh vibrating sponge this version contains a small pocket for a single speed, push button bullet vibrator. The only difference is the material of the sponge. Both sponge materials transmit the vibration from the bullet vibe really well. Cleaning up has never really been this much fun!

Materials: Sponge
Vibration: One Touch, Single Speed Bullet Vibrator
Batteries: Watch Batteries
Rating: *** 3 out of 5 Stars

This next item is perhaps my favorite item from the Sportsheets Sex In The Shower line. In fact, when I first was sent all of the items from them I pulled this one out of the pile and raved about how I was going to use it. Every lady at the office I showed it to instantly wanted one. What is it?

The Sex In The Shower Foot Rest
I know it doesn't look like much at first glance. However, let me tell you why it is so f'ing awesome. Let's start with its sex applications. When having shower sex one of the biggest obstacles is getting into the right position while still maintaing your balance. Remember the story from my last entry? This Sex In The Shower Foot Rest attaches to the wall of your shower with a strong suction cup. You can rest your foot on it to achieve the optimal position for sexual intercourse while standing.
This will give you much better leverage and will keep the person getting screwed from getting one of those horrible charlie horses in their leg or hip while having sex. Pair this Foot Rest up with the Dual Locking Handle and you are all set to have some of the best and safest shower sex of your life!

Okay, sex aside let me tell you how I plan on using the Sex In The Shower Foot Rest! Ladies listen up. This foot rest is PERFECT for use while you shave your legs! That's right! I know I may sound crazy here talking about a device designed for sex in such a practical way but sorry that's how I am going to use this thing. No more bending over to shave my legs. No more trying to balance with just my big toe on the edge of the tub. Now, I can perch my foot up and shave away without any worries at all! Once you use it ladies you will ask yourself how you ever lived without it! Trust me!

Materials: Hard Plastic with a Suction cup
Accessories: Dual Locking Handle, Shaving cream and Razor!
Rating: ***** 5 out of 5 Stars

If you have a sex or sex toy question that you want answered email the Dildo Whisperer at Or if you have a specific toy from my online store that you want the Dildo Whisperer to review let me know.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Sex In The Shower

I want to tell you about the first time I had sex with Iris. She met up with me at one of my many pride events. We spent all day out in the sun getting hot, sweaty, dusty and down right disgusting! Even though both of us couldn't wait to rip the clothes off the other and have hot sex there was no way either of us was willing go there given the our current condition. So in what I thought was a very wise suggestion I said we should jump in the shower. After all we would get naked, scrub each other down and then we were good to go. This is exactly how things were going. We were wet, slippery and going at it for all we were worth. But then something unexpected happened. I lost my footing in the shower and even though I had a firm grip on my girl there was nothing that was going to stop the motion of my body as I fell backward through the shower curtain. I reached for everything and anything I could as I fell in what felt like slow motion. My left hand gripped the right shoulder of Iris. My right hand grabbed a handful of shower curtain. I could hear the shower curtain rings pop one at a time as my knees were taken out from under me by the edge of the tub. Soon my ass hit the cold tile floor followed by my back and head. Water was flying everywhere as I looked up to Iris for help. Little did I realize in that moment that Iris too was on her way down. Before I knew what was happening Iris was landing squarely on top of me. I guess my death grip on her shoulder made her too lose her balance. There we were two revved up naked ladies lying on the floor of a hotel bathroom. The shower curtain was hanging by just a couple of rings and the room was filling with the spray of the shower. Did any of that stop us from reaching our orgasm? Of course NOT! We just started up where we left off before our unfortunate tumble.
Now, why dear readers did I share this tale of awkward shower sex? Because it demonstrates just one of the many risks of sex in the shower. I love shower sex. I love getting pulled into a shower with all of my clothes on and going at it but with soap and water comes some slippery issues that have to be dealt with. If you think the soap is slippery just imagine what happens if you were to say spill some of your favorite silicone lube in the shower (not recommended). It will turn your shower into a danger zone for MONTHS! You will literally need to hang a "Slippery When Wet" sign in your bathroom door. On a side note, I have always wanted one of those signs to post above my bed! Okay, so what is a shower sex lover like me to do? I could take up some yoga classes to try to beef up my balancing skills but there is actually a better solution.
My friends over at Sportsheets have come up with a whole line of Sex In the Shower toys. So for or the next couple of Blog entries I am going to go over a few of the items from this line of toys that you can find in the "Bath, Body & Wellness" section of my store.

Let's start with the Sex In The Shower device that could have saved my shower sex with Iris if we had been using it.
Sex In The Shower Dual Locking Handle

Now, I know what you are thinking. When did grandma's shower handle get here? Yep, that's what this thing looks like. True story. This device can save your sex in the shower life! The dual suction cups on the handle lock onto the wall of your shower in a secure fashion. This gives you something to grab a hold of during sex so you don't end up losing your balance like I did. If your partner starts making you weak in the knees with a mind blowing blow job just hold on tight and enjoy the ride. This handle can also help the top achieve the best position while maintaining a safe balancing act. Because it is based on suction cups this handle can be installed very easily and moved around as needed. This is the perfect shower accessory for you ladies too. Next time you shave your legs have it handy to keep you from losing your balance as you perch your leg up for shaving!

It is time you take my advice and remember NEVER have sex in the shower unless you know you have something to hold onto! Trust me you don't want to end up falling on the floor.
Materials: Hard Plastic with 2 Suction cups
Cleaning: Soap and Water
Rating: **** 4 out of 5 Stars

Doggie Strap

It doesn't matter what your sexual orientation is everyone can enjoy a good session of doggy style sex. Straight folks love it, gay boys dig it and even the lesbians can get in on the action. Why do we like doggie style so much? Because it is the perfect position for G-spot (for the ladies) and P-spot (for the boys) stimulation! You see when the bottom has their ass up in the air and the top is lined up behind them often the toy or dick that is fucking them fucks at a slightly downward motion. This puts pressure and strokes across one of the most sensitive pleasure spots in our whole body. Which is why so many people enjoy the doggie position thusly making it one of the most popular sex positions around. So how can you improve upon something that is already pretty f'ing wonderful?

This little device was made by one of my favorite sex toy companies, Sportsheets. They make all kinds of wonderful beginner bondage stuff. But they also make some really practical sex positioning aids that will have you asking why you have never used them before. The Doggie Strap is a very simple but genius design. What you do is slide the padded middle section of the strap under the hips of the person being fucked. Then the top takes the loop handles on both side of the strap and places them over the wrist. The lengths of the straps are completely adjustable. Holding onto the straps you can then use this Doggie Strap to move the hips of the bottom in pretty much any way you desire. It gives the top a whole new level of control and also relieves the pressure off the knees of the bottom. If you have syncing issues with your partner this Doggie Strap will fix that problem right up. Plus, you will achieve deeper penetration all while stroking the G or P-Spot of your partner. Give it a try, trust me you won't regret it!

You can find the Doggie Strap in the "Positioning Aids" section of my online toy store.

Materials: Nylon Straps,
Size: Adjustable Straps
Cleaning: Machine Washable
Rating: **** 4 out of 5 stars

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Wet Head

I'm a lesbian. I think it is safe to assume that being the Gold Star lesbian that I am that I have never given a man a blow job. So one might ask, "what can Romaine tell me that will help with my blow job technique?" This is a fair question. But just because I have never given a blowjob doesn't mean I don't know a thing or two that might help you. I know this much for sure. Blowjobs should be wet and lubed up! The more the better! You want your mouth to slip all over that shaft so you can deliver the best experience ever. Let's face facts; even the best "no flavor" lubes have a flavor. Sure it might be subtle but it might have enough of a taste that you just don't want to be licking it up while you give a blowjob. Even the yummy flavored lube can be a little over the top. Of course you can hope that you have enough spit to do your partner up right but most of the time that is just not the case. So what is a blowjob queen to do?


We have all seen those tasty little strips for fresh breath right? Well, Wet Head utilizes this technology but rather then freshen your breath these little strips help lube up your saliva. I don't know how these little strips do their magic but they really do work. They will turn your mouth into a slippery, wet place that will have your partner begging for more. These Wet Head strips aren't just for the pleasure of men either. I recently tried these strips out at home while I spent a little time working over my wife's clit. Wet Head is the perfect accessory for your tongue. Don't believe me? Try it out for yourself. You can find the lemon flavored Wet Head Strips in my new online store! The flavor isn't overwhelming but your new blowjob might be!

Material: Lemon Flavored Wet Head Strips
Count: 24
Details: Sugar Free, Travel Container
Rating: *** 3 out of 5 Stars

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Prostate Health

If you ask any guy in the world he will tell you that he hates going in for his prostate check up. Listen, I get it. But let's face facts Prostate Cancer has been becoming more and more common. Which is why it is so important to make sure men are doing everything in their power to keep their prostate healthy. Unlike keeping healthy in other ways keeping your prostate in good working order can actually be a ton of fun! Women have a G-spot, which is often described as this magical spot inside their pussies that creates amazing orgasms. Well, most people don't realize that men have their own version of the G-spot. I like to call it the P-spot. The prostate gland is actually very sensitive and responds in a very desireable way to stimulation. What's even better is that a P-spot massage can lead to incredible orgasms as well as prostate health! Sounds like a pretty fair trade to me.

Now, that you know how to achive a good orgasm and prostate health you probably need help picking the right toy to reach this end. I'm going to make this easy on you.
Prostate Health (yep, that's the name of this toy)

Prostate Health is made out of high grade silicone and has a very unique design. This flexable toy's crazy looking shape is actually designed to curve with the natural curves of the body. The boulbous head vibrates with the help of an insertable bullet vibe and teaches the man using this toy to relax while getting a gentle P-Spot massage. All of this will help reduce the risk of prostatis and BPM. Prosate Health also features a small thumb grip to help create a comfortable hold on the toy during use. You will hear me say this many times but all toys that are intended to go in your ass MUST have a flared base and this toy has that. The flared base prevents the toy from traveling past your sphincter in an undesired way. A flared base is a REQUIREMENT for all anal plug type toys.

If you or the guy in your life needs a little Prosate Health go to my toy store and pick up one of these great toys. It is time to make that next prostate check up easier.

Material: silicone
Size: 4.5" length 1" diameter
Vibration: Optional (with Bullet Vibe)
Lube: Water based Lube (I like thicker lubes for anal sex like Maximus)
Cleaning: Boilable, Bleachable and Dishwasher Safe
Accessories: Bullet Vibe (comes with it)
Rating: **** 4 out of 5 Stars